


Good Intentions

by RoseDemon



Category: She-Ra and the Princesses of Power (2018)
Genre: Canon Compliant, Character Study, For the Love of Shadow Weaver, FtLoSW, Hurt No Comfort
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-07
Updated: 2020-07-07
Packaged: 2021-03-05 00:00:25
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,740
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25135039
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/RoseDemon/pseuds/RoseDemon
Summary: Not everything is as it appears to be.She had only ever tried her best.I invite everyone to take a look, even if you don't like Shadow Weaver, because nothing and no one is ever black and white.
Relationships: Adora & Shadow Weaver | Light Spinner (She-Ra), Catra & Shadow Weaver | Light Spinner (She-Ra)
Kudos: 28





	Good Intentions

**Author's Note:**

> I do not condone abuse of any kind. But I do believe even the worst actions can come from good intentions.

_She_ had never expected raising children in the Horde to be easy. After all, the army was a place of order and discipline, and children weren't particularly known for either of those. There were children in the Horde of course. Though they were generally kept away and out of army operations at least until they were old enough to start training. Being second in command, _she_ couldn't very well take _herself_ out of there to attend to the two little rascals _she_ had found under _her_ care. If _her_ duties to the Horde would ever start lagging behind, Lord Hordak would have _her_ charges taken care of in a heartbeat.

Little sweet Adora learned this well enough. She learned not to cause trouble and to stay out of _her_ work. But then there was Catra.

This one never listened. She was feisty, and her fighting spirit would certainly be an asset in the Horde. But her attitude never aligned with the expectations of the army.

_She_ was hard on her. Harder than one probably should be on a child still so young, but then again _she_ didn't really know. _She_ didn't know how to be a mother. It's not like _she_ had had the best example _herself_ . The only thing _she_ knew for sure was that if Catra didn't learn to listen, to show respect, even if not always deserved, she would never get far in the Horde. Sooner or later it would be the little one's downfall.

The way of the army was all _she_ knew.

Of course _she_ knew that Adora instigated a fair share of the mischief those two got into herself. That's just how children are sometimes. But if Catra wouldn't listen to _her_ , then maybe if Adora saw the consequences the escapades could have on her friend, maybe she would think better of it and try harder to talk sense into her companion. She seemed to be the only one who could ever get through to Catra.

_She_ watched _her_ relationship with _her_ children slowly deteriorate over the years. _She_ saw the distrust in Catra's eyes slowly turn to hate. And _she_ just let it happen. Love would not protect them against Lord Hordak

When _she_ made Adora force captain, Catra was bound to be furious, to be hurt. No matter how true Adora's words were, _she_ wasn't willing to budge on this decision. Between hurting Catra's feelings and protecting her from her own attitude, her safety would always win. While Catra had made significant progress, she was still unpunctual and snippy. At least as long as she was still a cadet, Hordak would not pay her any mind.

But then Adora disappeared, and _she_ was willing to move mountains to get _her_ little girl back. _She_ sent Catra after her, because _she_ thought if anyone could convince Adora to come back, it would be her. And when that didn’t work she started to suspect that Catra knew more than she was letting on.

_She_ was horrified when Hordak demanded Catra be made force captain. _She_ tried to persuade him otherwise. If he started to have expectations of her, there was no telling the kind of trouble she could get herself into. _She_ did not need to look at Catra to notice the hurt at _her_ own words, or the silent glee at Hordak's. If _she_ could just get Adora back, they would both be that much safer.

Just this once _she_ needed Catra to cooperate. The princesses had been slowly losing for decades. Surely Catra understood that if Adora went on fighting on the front lines for the rebellion, she was most likely to die. But Catra did not cooperate and Hordak was furious. It was only the beginning.

After _her_ shadow spies followed Adora to Mystacor _her_ mind was swarmed with the possibilities. Not only could _she_ get _her_ daughter back, _she_ also knew this place, knew how they operated and most importantly their weak points. If _she_ could take it down… well. It would have to be seen what difference it made in the war, as they weren't actually taking part in it, but it certainly would show the rebellion not to mess with _her_.

Maybe _she_ should have expected this. Just when it seemed as though _she_ had finally created enough doubt in the blonde's mind to have her return home, she just had to throw it back in _her_ face. Adora had always had the ability to be just as stubborn as Catra, if not more so, if she wanted to be. _She_ pushed past the weird knot in _her_ chest at Adora's accusations and doubled down on _her_ efforts. It wouldn’t matter in the end, if _she_ could just see _her_ girl safe.

So when they caught Princess Glimmer, _she_ was ready to do whatever it took. Because whether or not the Queen complied with the Horde's commands, Adora would come for her friend. And when she did _she_ would be ready.

Things didn't go to plan. They never seemed to if it had anything to do with _her_ daughters. Mostly _she_ just hadn't counted on Catra willingly letting Adora go.

Catra had accused _her_ of taking credit for her accomplishments, but a commander needs to prepare for the worst case scenario, which in this case undoubtedly came to be. And if things went 

awry, which appeared to be a common occurrence lately, _she_ would be the centre of Hordak's wrath, not _her_ daughter. And with the unknown variable of the newly reformed princess alliance, _she_ wasn’t willing to take any chances.

The reaction _she_ got from Hordak when he learned that not only had _she_ disregarded his orders but also kept She-Ra's true identity a secret from him, _she_ expected. What surprised _her_ was Catra’s reaction afterwards. There was that same accusation and more, but it still gave _her_ hope that their relationship hadn't entirely disintegrated yet. Even if Catra didn’t think she needed her mother anymore, _she_ would still do everything in _her_ power to protect her. And _she_ would bear whatever consequences came with it. _She_ wasn't too worried, after all Hordak still needed _her_.

But then Hordak decided to hand the Black Garnet over to Entrapta and _she_ had to admit that maybe all these years _she_ had underestimated _her_ little girl.

Even so _she_ would never willingly hand over the Black Garnet. It meant surrendering _her_ source of power and with it _her_ only real resource to protect _her_ children.

When Catra first came to visit _her_ cell, _she_ was glad to see her still alive and well. Though part of _her_ had hoped that after this much time _her_ daughter was no longer in the Horde. Without anyone watching over her, the Horde had become an even more dangerous place to be than the front lines.

 _She_ just took the verbal onslaught. It seemed to help _her_ girl. Besides, _she_ had no right to complain.

The next time Catra came to visit, she had come prepared for a fight. The surprise on the girl's face at _her_ willing cooperation was certainly enough evidence of that.

 _She_ knew which file she was referring to, of course. _She_ had had to throw it out after a moment of carelessness on _her_ part had allowed Adora and Catra to draw on it when they were barely four. It made Catra's accusation of sabotage sting that much more.

Afterwards _she_ thought that maybe _she_ could still be a guide to _her_ daughter. Though _she_ didn't expect _her_ charge to start heeding _her_ words now of all times. And as time went on Catra never stayed long enough to talk. So _she_ just sat there in her cell. Missing the familiar buzz of magic at _her_ fingertips, feeling not for the first time, just how blaringly incapable _she_ was of protecting that which was dear to _her_ without it. Not that _her_ powers would have made much of a difference at this point.

When Catra did stay to talk again, it was only to tell _her_ that _she_ was to go to Beast Island. And in all honesty, _she_ knew this was coming, had counted the days until it did. _She_ expected Catra to want _her_ gone as soon as possible, really. And when it seemed that she didn’t, _she_ started to see another possibility. _She_ wouldn’t stay in the Fright Zone, of course. No matter what _her_ girl tried to do, Hordak wouldn’t allow it. And _she_ wasn’t willing to let Catra risk anything for _her_ . So when Catra asked _her_ to give her something, _she_ gave her the truth. _She_ had already given _her_ children to the Horde. _She_ had nothing else to give.

 _She_ couldn’t protect Catra any longer, but maybe _she_ could still help Adora.

Catra would blame _her_ for this, _she_ knew. It wasn’t likely _she_ would see her again, though. After all _she_ would just be trading one prison for another, if the curse didn’t kill _her_ outright after using up the last of _her_ magic. It was nice to have a moment to say goodbye all the same.

_She_ was right there at _her_ daughter’s side, so of course this would be when the curse would take hold of _her_ . And when _she_ woke up again, Adora was nowhere to be seen.

 _She_ had come to Bright Moon fully intending to give the information, but _she_ was dying and _she_ wanted to see _her_ daughter one last time, if not to make amends, then at least to say goodbye.

Watching them get riled up when even their attempt at a truth spell didn’t get _her_ to talk was entertaining, certainly, but they were wasting _her_ time.

Of course _she_ should have known Adora would sneak in. 

_She_ would give her exactly what _she_ gave Catra as a farewell. The truth. _She_ would have answered her questions all the same, with or without the deal. But of course Adora wouldn’t let _her_ die like that, even if she made it clear that _her_ presence was not appreciated. _Her_ little girl had always been kind like that. Maybe a bit too kind at times. Really the best thing _she_ was getting out of this was getting to help _her_ daughter.

Since Adora seemed reluctant to accept the truths she had already been told, maybe this time _she_ needed to slip a lie in for her to believe the rest.

The thing worrying _her_ , wasn’t that Glimmer teleported into _her_ room. It was that she had come without Adora. And Glimmer’s words only confirmed _her_ fear.

The princess was a powerful young girl. And smart, just like her father. She too could see that if they wanted to have any chance at saving _her_ daughter, they would need to work together.

_She_ did not want to take any risks. But then again, they didn’t have time to argue. And much like _she_ expected, the bigger group meant less accuracy. Even so there was no way _she_ would let anyone come between _her_ and Adora, not even Catra. It was not the reunion _she_ would have hoped for.

And yet still they were too late. _She_ was too late.

Once again it became _her_ daughter’s responsibility to save the day. It was part of the reason why _she_ felt so out of place at their celebration.

_She_ could feel the anxious energy throughout the castle prior to the coronation. And while _she_ enjoyed being able to stretch _her_ legs, the guards following _her_ everywhere were annoying. Sometimes _she’d_ rather go back to the peace and quiet of _her_ prison. Though _she_ was also worried about how this change might affect _her_ daughter.

Being at Bright Moon, with its many giant windows and bright colours, reminded _her_ so much of _her_ time at Mystacor. _She_ didn’t look back on it particularly fondly, though it certainly wasn’t all bad. _She_ had tried so hard to be someone they would accept. But even when it seemed they did, _she_ was one of the youngest to ever get a statue in the hall of sorcerers, they still didn’t trust _her_ . _She_ certainly never felt valued.

The only ones who seemed to appreciate _her_ were _her_ students. And at the very front was always sweet little Micah. _She_ had wanted him by _her_ side, not so much for his power like everyone assumed, but because he genuinely enjoyed _her_ presence.

_She_ had truly enjoyed teaching. Helping the little minds explore the wonders of magic, watching their progress, for a long time _she_ didn’t think _she’d_ ever need anything else.

So when the Horde started to invade, _she_ wanted to protect _her_ home. But the head sorcerer Norwyn was old and stuck in the past. Too old certainly to ever consider any kind of change, even a change for the better.

Though admittedly _her_ attempt to change things didn’t quite work out the way _she_ had hoped.

Seeing the new queen’s little display only went to show that she took after her father in more ways than one. _She_ had felt the raw potential of the queen before, had told her as much, and suddenly _she_ could feel that old impulse to teach rise again. Talking to Glimmer, it felt so much like talking to one of _her_ students, encouraging them to find their own way, to trust in their potential.

All in all, it was probably best to keep busy, to stop _her_ thoughts from straying. So _she_ might as well return to an old hobby of _hers_. Though Bright Moon would never compare to the gardens of Mystacor.

After their last encounter, _she_ was surprised to see Glimmer back so soon. Regardless, _she_ was happy to help out the Queen. Anything, if it was to protect _her_ girl. And if _she_ could build up trust with her, _she_ might be allowed to do so much more than the occasional bouts of advice.

By now _she_ shouldn’t be surprised that Adora would only come to _her_ with more accusations. The deep distrust hurt, even if it might have been deserved.

Teaching Glimmer was like teaching a female version of Micah. From the gift for magic to the child-like excitement and easy distractions. In a way, it was nice. Even if the interrogation sprouted no results.

But _she_ decidedly did not like Double Trouble. For the simple reason that they were making fun of _her_ daughter.

The heart of Etheria could be a blessing for them. Sure, it could also be destructive, but much like with the spell of obtainment, there must be some alteration they could make. Though _she_ wouldn’t push anyone towards it. If they were going to go for it, it would be their own choice. _She_ did not want a repeat of Micah.

Scorpia showing up at the castle couldn’t mean anything good. She was loyal to a fault. _She_ had partnered Catra up with her on purpose for this very reason. With Adora gone, _she_ had thought that maybe Catra could use a friend. Scorpia leaving the Horde meant something had to be very wrong. And by what Scorpia was saying, that seemed to be _her_ daughter.

Sitting around and waiting never felt so agonizing. Even _her_ garden could not calm her mind, though the horde princess certainly wasn’t doing anything for _her_ fraying nerves either.

So it was good to hear that Queen Glimmer had come up with a plan. But then just as quickly the anxious knot in _her_ chest returned. They couldn’t rush into anything with this. Glimmer’s plan was holey at best, and on top of that Double Trouble had escaped.

But of course, the queen did not listen to _her_ . Because why would anyone ever listen to _her_.

The surprises for that day weren’t over yet either it seemed. There was _her_ sweet little Micah, angry with _her_ . Hating _her_ . And _she_ had to be the bearer of bad news for both him and _her_ daughter.

_She_ found herself arguing with the other members of the rebellion once again. They had barely had a chance against the Horde before, if they wanted to change anything now they needed more power. Obviously _she_ knew that they would need a proper plan this time, but _she_ couldn’t do it alone. _Her_ daughter had been stuck somewhere in space with a dictator for over a year now. _She_ thought that Micah at least would be willing to consider it for his little girl.

Now that they had the king back, _she_ would have done everything in _her_ power to protect him too, like _she_ should have done so long ago. But ‘everything’ was agonizingly little and try as _she_ might, _she_ could not stand up against the galactic Horde and a chipped princess on _her_ own. _She_ was still powerless to do anything but watch from the sidelines. Of course it was only a matter of time before someone threw it in _her_ face. Like _she_ didn’t know that no one liked having _her_ around. _She_ couldn’t let it bother _her_ though. They didn’t have time for distractions.

Now that Castaspella was there, maybe _she_ had finally found the help _she_ needed. Someone who was willing to hear _her_ out. When Casta agreed despite her obvious weariness, _she_ was already about to reply before _she_ thought better of it. Better not to push _her_ luck.

Mind control. _She_ had been accused of manipulation often enough, mind control, though, was new. But _she_ needed Casta and if she wasn’t willing to trust _her_ , _she_ could work with that. After all, they had the same goal.

_She_ was unbelievably relieved to see both _her_ girls had returned safely from space. For a glorious moment it overshadowed the rebellion’s losses, Micah’s loss, and the formidable odds they were facing.

Just this once _she_ needed them to listen to _her_ , or at the very least listen to Castaspella. Even now _she_ was still the bad guy. Like _she_ was at fault for the disaster that happened last year. As if _she_ hadn’t tried to talk the queen out of it.

 _She_ was only suggesting exactly what the others had wanted to do anyway, and somehow that made _her_ evil? For wanting to stop the war?

They didn’t have time to worry about feelings. Not _hers_ , not Catra’s. They needed to get to Mystacor, soon. It was probably not the time to go further through the risks now. They were just barely willing to go along with it because Casta had vouched for the plan. _She_ needed to trust that _her_ daughter was strong enough.

Catra was still as impulsive as ever. This impulsivity had always been a drawback during fights, and especially during the stealth mission they were currently undertaking. She was often so caught up in herself that she lost sight of the bigger picture.

 _She_ wasn’t angry at Catra for blowing their cover. Rather _she_ was angry with _herself_ for the fear _she_ induced in _her_ own daughter. Sometimes, the line between the two blurred.

_She_ was getting tired of the constant accusations. Just like anyone else, _she_ knew _she_ had many faults. And just like everyone else, _she_ had to live with the consequences of _her_ actions. _She_ didn’t need to be reminded of it all the time. At some point it had to be enough.

Even with their broken relationships, _she_ knew _her_ children well enough to see what was going on. And _she_ didn’t know what to think of it.

Magic needed focus, a lot of it, and Adora’s feelings for Catra were taking away from her focus. If Adora couldn’t transform into She-Ra, she might still be able to save Etheria, but she wouldn’t come out of it alive. They didn’t particularly have time to work out those feelings either.

And yet again, someone was mad at _her_ for speaking the truth.

They were all mad at _her_. Because of course they were. Anger was easy to deal with. Certainly easier than doubt. They didn’t want to admit that they didn’t know how to take Horde Prime down, and they certainly couldn’t admit that they doubted Adora’s ability to pull it off. 

_She_ didn’t want to risk _her_ daughter’s life any more than any of then, but _she_ had faith in Adora. _She_ had watched her grow up, felt the power growing within her. Adora’s friends should have faith in her abilities as well. Her easy win against Micah should have been enough of a testimony for her strength.

Somehow _her_ relationship with Adora still got worse. _She_ had wanted _her_ daughter to know that _she_ was supporting her, and in return _she_ got still more accusations. Despite only ever doing what _she_ could to protect _her_ little girls.

_She_ had never felt so out of place in _her_ life. And _she_ certainly did not pick a healthy way to deal with it. It didn’t matter anymore.

 _She_ didn’t have enough power to be of use to anyone. Still, _she_ wasn’t about to leave a distressed Catra alone. A teleportation spell was likely to take up all _her_ strength. While Adora had healed _her_ from the curse before, there wasn’t any guarantee that it wouldn’t return. But when it came to _her_ daughter, there really was no choice to make.

Yet again, _she_ had to watch _her_ daughter fight the danger while _she_ couldn’t stop it. What _she_ could do was get Adora to the heart, and then that should save Catra as well. But Adora was too stubborn to leave Catra. As she had always been.

There comes a time in every mother's life where they have to accept that their children have grown independent. _She_ needed to accept the decisions they made, and support them through it.

When _she_ had gone to the Horde, it was because _she_ had nothing left to lose. Now _she_ had everything to lose.

The little bit of magic _she_ could syphon from the heart would not last _her_ long. But there had to be time to let Catra know that _she_ cared, always had.

_Her_ little girls weren't so little anymore. They were capable of protecting themselves, and each other. They didn't need _her_ anymore, and they certainly didn't seem to want _her_ around either. So _she_ would do them a favour and leave.


End file.
